“I will run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.”
My heart has felt distant from you, Lord. Being out of my schedule can bring a sense of disorientation. However, my stability, peace and sense of rightness should actually come from you alone, O God, not from the structure of my life.
As your Word says, “My God is my rock in whom I take refuge. He is my shield, the horn of my salvation, my stronghold” (Ps. 18:2b). So, whether I am firmly in a protecting schedule, or my life is chaotic, you are there, Lord God: solid, sure, always loving, kind and firm. You are my Light, my Love, my Life.
This unsettledness is actually a positively powerful thing, surfacing my wrong dependence on accomplishment, achievement, action, maintaining control and being good in my own strength. It points me to repentance and setting my eyes and heart on you, Lord Jesus.
So I turn my eyes to you and praise you, Lord God: my Triune, Eternal, Personal and Holy God—utterly other, entirely independent, sincerely sinless and incomprehensibly complex. You created me, chose me, cleansed me, claimed me as your child, commissioned me to special service, and I stand before you dearly loved, deeply cared for, delighted in, doted on and positively dependent on you.
What I actually deserve as a sinner is condemnation, punishment, eternal separation, failure, suffering, hopelessness, despair, death and hell.
But instead, your great and marvelous grace—ever flowing, never ending, always giving—pours continually into our lives, bringing undeserved forgiveness, gracious cleansing, ongoing transformation, needed strengthening, clear guidance, great goodness, positive power and wide wisdom. What a wonder!