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Nurturing Your First Love for Jesus

 
“The King is mighty; he loves justice—you have established equity;” Psalm 99:4a
 
Praise be to you, Lord Jesus, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Ruler of the universe, Creator and Sustainer of all. You are the star-Breather, the atom Keeper, the earth Spinner, and the dawn Bringer. I exalt you, King Jesus, for you are mighty and powerful, the Most High, the immeasurably strong, majestically great and eternal God.
 
You are undefeatable, unconquerable, unlimited, unending. You are the Source of all strength, the Spring of all power, the Author of all authority. You are the Ruler who reigns in all regions of life. No bird flies without your knowledge, no man sins without your grief, no person acts without your seeing, and no evil is allowed that cannot be woven into your plan of redemption and revival.
 
Lord, “…you have done what is just and right.” Therefore, we will “Exalt the LORD our God and worship at his footstool; he is holy” (Ps. 99:4b,5). We praise you, Lord God that we can bow before your footstool, that you allow us entrance into your presence, that as we come in the blood of Christ, that our worship is acceptable to you.
 
I exalt you Lord God for what you are: pure and powerful, good and gracious, mighty and magnificent, wise and wonderful, holy and happy, eternal and ever-present, all seeing and all knowing, intimate and involved, caring and consistent, loving and lavish, rich and real, forgiving and forever. You, Lord God—Father, Son and Holy Spirit—are Triune and Complete in yourself; you are worthy of worship without considering how your qualities benefit me—and they certainly do!
 
Prayer: “To you be glory and honor today in my life as I live under the hand of your love and protection, deeply satisfied in you, Lord God, the great Shepherd and King of my life. Amen.” –From Edified!
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Psalm 18:31

Had a technical glitch so have been unable to post for the last several days on this site. Sorry. Thanks to my son, Josh, all is resolved, so we will press on with posting.
Psalm 18:31 “For who is God besides the LORD? And who is the Rock except our God?”
There is no one else like you, O LORD, the Eternal One with no beginning or ending–all others are creatures with a finite start, each one designed to be in relation to you. You, as LORD, are the only source of unchanging goodness, unwavering stability and unending grace.
Although you are the great and mighty God of history, of eternity, of all that is to come, you have made yourself “our God.” You are not distant and demanding. No, you are personal and patient, compassionate and kind, concerned and consistent. In your love we find rest.
You are the “wholly other One,” different from your creatures in essence, in eternalness, in entirety. You are perfect in each part, so there is no need for change or growth, maturing or learning. You know all, you do all in completeness, you make no mistakes. You are the solid Rock of Truth, Stability and Love, totally trustable, fully faithful and completely compassionate.
What appears to be failure from a human perspective, is actually perfection in process. Think of the death of Christ–without this seeming defeat, there would have been no resurrection, no regeneration, no redemption. His death was one part of the perfect plan you were bringing to pass.
In a similar way you are at work in our lives today, bringing good to pass through the ups and downs of life. You only are our Lord, you only are the Rock, you only are to be worshiped.
Guide us today, Lord, in resting in you, in thinking Truth, in praising you in all, and in seeing the daily God-sightings as you lovingly work in our lives.
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Language Learning

Chapter 87 Ministry In Germany
In addition to the economic differences in Germany, there was another difficulty for me with this relocation to Europe: the language. I could speak enough German to buy things, ask basic questions and have an informal chat, but that is not adequate for actually living here.
 
On a scale of 0 to 5 to measure fluency in German, I was below 1, probably at 0.5! The prospect of starting to learn the nuances of another language at my age of 62 was daunting.
In addition, my minimal German meant I would be severely limited in my ability to minister. However, the Lord had some surprises in store for me.
 
First, he brought five “disciples” into my life, all of whom spoke adequate-to-excellent English. This meant I was not hampered at all in developing friendships with these men and freely teaching them along the way. What a great outlet that was when all the rest of my relationships hobbled along with my very basic German.
 
Second, God had placed me in a situation for absorbing this new language in a reasonably painless fashion. Barbara’s motherOmi could speak no English, so it was necessary to have all my interaction with her in German. When Barbara and I were with her, even when we spoke with each other, it had to be in German.
 
There were some trials in this. Omi could not seem to understand that it was my limited vocabulary that hampered me in grasping what she wanted. She thought I was just not very bright! I would be helping her in the garden and she would give me a command, “Get me the Hacke!” I had no idea what a “Hacke” was, so I would have to ask for an explanation, which just confirmed her suspicions about my IQ!
 
At 90, Omi struggled herself just to remember the proper names of things, so she was unable come up with any synonyms to help me out. She would impatiently point and repeat the same word again. I, of course, felt like a fool, and struggled to figure out what she was indicating.
 
Part of my difficulty was that I knew what Omi thought of me. In her generation, people looked at missionaries as those that had failed in everything else in life, and the only job they could find was to go somewhere else and share the gospel. Therefore, even before I failed in a particular task, I was already a total failure in her eyes.
 
This situation, however, was another gift from God. He was working on my fear of man, my desire to look good, to appear competent, to feel like I had some worth in this new culture. It was a powerful opportunity to remind myself of where my true worth came from: being made in the image of God, being redeemed by the blood of the Lamb; and being adopted into the family of God.
 
God consistently led me to praise Him for my embarrassing and stressful moments, to let go of wanting to appear competent, and to relax in His love. Then I could think clearly and usually figure out what it was that Omi wanted. He was setting me free from fear of man, helping me to walk in a healthy fear of God.
 
Another struggle that Omi and I had was with finding things. I often could not locate the item she sent me to get from the cellar or the pantry. I knew what I was looking for, but frequently she had put it in a different container than I expected, or hidden it behind something.
She knew exactly where the desired object was and could not fathom my inability to find it. These situations were, again, chances to let go, hold on and rise above, to walk into the freedom of God-given worth, belonging and competence. It also made me better at searching for things!
 
In the midst of these struggles, it would have been easy to see Omi as the enemy, but God gave me a great love for her, a warm, positive, caring love. I could easily and whole-heartedly help her in things around the house, letting her negative statements and views roll off me like water off a duck. Indeed, I was covered with the oil of gladness, impermeable to the water of worldly words of dissatisfaction and discontent. This was completely His doing and I praise Him for it.
 
A third helpful factor in learning German was the plethora of material to learn from. Not being a classroom type of learner, I worked on my German daily by reading the newspaper, listening to some radio and TV, and taking every opportunity for conversation.
 
The most effective means of language acquisition, however, was while doing my morning Bible reading in the New Testament. Since I knew the passages quite well in English, as I read it in German, I could note grammatical structures and guess at word meanings more easily than in the newspaper.
 
Later I got hold of a parallel New Testament with German in one column and Turkish in the next. Having the languages side by side made it very easy to compare and learn. By the end of our time in Germany, I was able to comprehend 95% of what I was reading in the German Bible.

Picture: Omi with grandson  Josh and his son Maxwell

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Psalm 18:28

Psalm 18:28 “You, O LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.”
[You are light itself, Lord, shining brilliantly across the eons of time, shining long before the sun and stars were created.
And now you are the source of light for our lives—physical light as well as the light of wisdom, insight, guidance and warning. You actively grant direction when we have no idea what to do. I praise you for your faithful, sure, constant presence, your leading us on in the challenges of life in this dark world.
You are the One, Lord Jesus, who brought us out of the dominion of darkness into your Kingdom of Light. As it says in Proverbs 4:18,19, “The way of the wicked (as we were) is like deep darkness, they do not know what makes them stumble.”
In contrast, “The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever more brightly until the full light of day.” Help us, Lord, not to look back on the darkness, but to look ahead at your guiding light, moving ever more into its full strength so that we may see and void what can make us stumble.
I praise you that darkness cannot hide anything from you, Lord, for you see all and you let us know what is necessary, giving us enough light so that we can move ahead with you, doing what is best. Help us to live in the light with you, Lord, joining you in what you are doing, thereby bringing you glory.]
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Psalm 18:27b

Psalm 18:27b “but [you] bring low those whose eyes are haughty.”
[This you also do in your love, Lord: you humble those who live in the darkness of self-delusion, encouraging them to come to you in the light. But unfortunately they prefer darkness, thinking they are good enough to get to heaven, thinking they are better than those around them.
Lord, how easily I get caught up in that same sin, thinking negative, critical thoughts of others, comparing myself to them rather than you. The truth is that the negative I see in them is also potential in me, if not actual; I could easily do the same things I proudly condemn in them, blithely underestimating the evil of my old nature.
Yes, Lord, keep us in the light of your revelation and bring us quickly to repentance when we are proud, so that we may immediately submit to you. Then we may be raised up to living in the luster of your love rather than the darkness of our deception.
Praise be to you, for your working in us–gracious and patient, continual and deep–bringing transformation through your Word in our mind, will and emotions so that we might walk on ever higher levels with you. Keep our spirits open to your conviction, direction and protection, remembering that “You save the humble but bring low those whose eyes are haughty.”
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Psalm 18:27

Psalm 18:27 “You save the humble”
 
This, Lord, is your requirement for salvation: humility, which can be defined as “seeing ourselves as you see us.”
 
As we stand before you, the Mighty, Eternal One, the Star-breather, the Galaxy-maker, the History Beginner and the Ender of time, the Pure and Powerful One, what can we do but see our sinfulness, our unworthiness, our puniness, and yes, our putridness. We see the immense contrast between our shriveled, rebellious hearts and the stunning beauty of your gracious Holiness.
 
To you we must bow in humility, accepting your view of our situation. Somehow you work with our will to bring the desire and the decision to surrender, to reject the illusion of independence for the reality of total, healthy dependence on you.
 
The reality is that you are the One in charge, who holds together the nucleus of every atom in the universe, who keeps every star in place, who brings the dawn, gives the rain, provides our food—we are totally dependent on you in every area without knowing it! And you give us the added privilege of enhancing that dependency by willfully embracing it in belief and submission–giving you all that we had been holding back, including our future.
 
Praise be to you for especially working in the heart of each one whom you know will believe, bringing the wise and persistent pressure that will lead to the break-through and surrender, giving the understanding, the desire to know you, to live for you, to walk in the light, to bring you glory.
 
What a high calling you give us, what a privileged position, what an existence of ongoing, ever growing joy that you offer.
You give us the exact opposite of what we deserve, at great cost to yourself and at great profit to us who were naturally your thankless enemies.
 
You, Lord God, are a marvel, a mystery; you are majestic and mighty in your provision of rich, unending agape love. Such Truth leads us to wholeheartedly and joyfully bow before you and shout, “Glory!”
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Psalm 18:25-26

 
Psalm 18:25,26 “To the faithful you show yourself faithful,
to the blameless you show yourself blameless, to the pure you show yourself pure,”
 
[we can only have these qualities, Lord Jesus, as your Holy Spirit produces them in us. As we cooperate with you in the process of transformation, willfully wanting to be faithful, blameless and pure, you reveal your marvelous qualities to us more and more, giving us greater ground for surrender, worship and wonder–which then bring more transformation.
 
As it says in 2 Corinthians 3:18, “And we all, who with unveiled faces, contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” This is the gracious cycle of your goodness poured out more and more on those who are willing to join you in what you are doing.]
 
“but to the crooked you show yourself shrewd.”
 
[On the negative side, you interact with rebels in a way that is meaningful to them, a way that gets their attention, a case in point being Jacob. From the beginning he was crooked in his dealings, manipulating and using people all through his life. And he brought on himself the same treatment. Your shrewdness in thus dealing with him brought him, in the end, on his death bed, to surrender before you.
 
You know how to work with people, you are never at a loss, never confused on how to proceed, never without wisdom. Praise be to you for your patience, persistence and perception in the process of wooing to yourself every single person in the world, as the Holy Spirit convicts everyone of sin, righteousness and judgment (John 16:8-11).
 
How you must grieve at those who stubbornly refuse to bow their knee to Truth, to Wisdom, to Reality, and instead rush headlong down the slope of self will, away from goodness, forgiveness, grace and light. In the end they go over the edge of time, falling into the pit of separation, darkness and desperation, sealed off from all good, getting what they wanted: full independence from you.
 
Praise you, Lord, that you go to great lengths to give them full opportunity to embrace Truth, even though you know they will not accept it. It is wonderful that you are not fair, for then we would all end up in hell. Instead, you are full of grace, offering us freely the opposite of what we deserve: forgiveness, cleansing, transformation, acceptance, belonging, worth, purpose, protection, provision, hope and a certain future with you.
 
Help me to focus today on the wonder of who you are, Lord Jesus, not the minuscule disappointments of life that seek to grab my attention. Thank you for how you are going to guide me today in joining you, exalting you, living for you.
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Psalm 18:20-24

Psalm 18:20 “The LORD has dealt with me according to my righteousness;”
[O Lord, praise you that you deal with us according to the imputed righteousness you have given us in Christ, not our own–for I have none. You would have to condemn me instantly to Hell if my goodness were the measure. But praise be to your glorious name that you have made me to stand before you in your all-cleansing righteousness: forgiven, transformed, accepted, adopted, dearly loved!]
“according to the cleanness of my hands he has rewarded me.”
[My sin-stained hands are now washed in your blood, cleansed of guilt, purified in forgiveness and empowered for good. Praise you, Lord Jesus, that you see me as your dearly loved child, delighted in, cherished and deeply cared for. The cleanness is there because of your great work.]
Psalm 18:21 “For I have kept the ways of the LORD; I have not done evil by turning from my God.”
[By your grace, by your power, by your obedience, Lord Jesus, I am counted as having kept your ways. What my old nature could not do in that it is weak, you did in your power. And you, Heavenly Father, in spite of what I am, have qualified me to be a partaker in the inheritance of the saints in the Kingdom of Light.]
Psalm 18:22,23 “All his laws are before me; I have not turned away from his decrees. I have been blameless before him and have kept myself from sin.”
[Again, I cannot say any of this for myself; I continue to be blameworthy, struggling with the sinful, selfish ways of my old nature—but you, Holy Spirit, also continue in transforming me in love and grace. So, I stand before you, Lord Jesus, blameless in your love, a new creature, dearly loved, doted on and deeply cared for. Praise be to you!
You are our hope, our holiness, our purity, our power. In you is goodness, grace and glory, all of which you generously, whole-heartedly share with us, continually, unconditionally, contra-conditionally. Praise be to you!]
Psalm 18:24 “The LORD has rewarded me according to my righteousness, according to the cleanness of my hands in his sight.”
Praise you, Lord Jesus, for your great and, humanly speaking, impossible, unspeakable work, far beyond what any created being could do. You reward your enemies! You pour out on your foes who come to you, eternal life, eternal relationship, eternal love and eternal goodness–when we deserve the opposite! Praise be to you.
Help us to revel in your love, to bask in your grace, to rejoice in your forgiveness—and to forgive and accept ourselves as you have us. May we each day grasp more of the greatness of your love, which surpasses knowledge, so that we might be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God (Eph. 3:19).]
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Inner Light

Praise you, Lord, that with you, every day is a Sonny one, for your light of love and life shines continually on us and in us, giving encouragement, perspective, purpose, power and joy: “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you,” said Jesus, and then “These thing I have spoken to you that my joy might remain in you and that your joy might be full” (John 15:9,11).
There is a condition to receiving this joy: trust. As it says in Romans 15:13, “May the God of hope fill you will all joy and peace AS YOU TRUST IN HIM, so that your lives may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Trusting God involves submitting to Him, to His description of reality, to His Word, to His leadership, to His purpose and meaning.
We can’t walk in the light while keeping our eyes closed, living just in the tiny world in our head. We have to open our eyes wide to the wonderful, awesome, expansive and beautiful reality of God’s Kingdom.
Here we own nothing, but are given everything we need to steward. We are called to hold all with an open hand, telling our gracious and kind, good and wise Heavenly Father, “Take what you want, leave what you want, give what you want. I trust you to do what is best.”
Holding all with an open hand is, on one side, scary at first, because there are plenty of things we don’t want to give up (health, relationships, income, security, savings, etc.).
But as we come to know more and more of God’s beautiful and wise character, our fear lessens (perfect love casts out fear), and is replaced by a sense of security (safety is not the absence of danger, but the presence of Jesus), and a sense of adventure (every day is a battle with spiritual enemies who use people against us; but as we keep on the armor and fight the right enemies, there is a continual string of victories). We begin to understand what it means to be more than conquerors in the midst of challenges (Romans 8:37), and can press on in His strength.
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Being “Car-ed” for

On the way home from the hospital after getting my angiogram, Dr. Christian said, “My wife and I would like to give you a car. We bought this one recently and put an ad for our old one in the paper, but for some reason the paper never printed it. I think the Lord did that so we could give it to you!”
 
I was flabbergasted! He wasn’t even a believer, hardly knew me and was making an offer like this! I certainly wasn’t going to refuse it!
 
The only drawback was that Dr. Christian’s car had a standard transmission. We’d hoped to get a car with an automatic so Barbara could drive; but on the other hand, if Barbara didn’t have to drive, it would take some stress out of her life here.
 
The next day we went over to Dr. Christian’s to see the car. And what a car it was! A luxury VW station wagon with four wheel drive, 16 inch tires, a 6 cylinder diesel engine, 6 speed transmission, individually heated seats, and so on. it was a true doctor’s car. And it was a beautiful spruce green, one of my favorite colors. It was everything I’d ever wanted in a vehicle but never had!
 
As I looked it over, Dr. Christian said, “I’ve decided not to give it to you, but to keep it in my name. That way I can put it on my insurance and I will also pay the taxes on it.”
 
Wow! That would save us a bundle of money! The Lord certainly was showering us with His goodness.
 
Later that week Dr. Christian took me with him to register the car and got us “JC 12” for a license plate. “I thought that a plate mentioning Jesus Christ and His 12 disciples would be good for a believer like you!” he said. How thoughtful!
Then the next week when we went to visit Dr. Christian and Melanie, he reached out his hand and said, “Here, take this.”
“What is it?” I asked.
“It’s a credit card. Use if for your diesel fuel purchases and I’ll cover the costs!”
In addition, he proceeded to pay for all the repairs on the car when needed, put new tires on it, changed the summer and winter tires at the proper time and even paid my traffic fines!
This was a whole series of wonderful gifts from God through this man—–much better than being able to sell our old car in Turkey and then buy an ancient one here in Germany. The Lord was filling our cup to more than overflowing!
Moving to Europe from the Turkish economy had meant that our income through supporting churches was not going to cover our expenses very well, especially with the value of the dollar dropping constantly. But now, with Dr. Christian and Melanie’s gifts, more than one third of our expenses were covered. What a wonderful provision from God!
Not only did He provide us with transportation, but this car was so much fun to drive that when Barbara would suggest we go downtown, I was ready to go, just to be able to drive it more! And when it came to driving on the autobahn, we could buzz along at 100 to 110 miles per hour (160 to 180 kilometers per hour) and it felt like we were doing 60, it was so smooth and stable.
We praised Him every time we got in the car, and we thanked Him just as often for Dr. Christian and Melanie’s generosity.
Our friendship with Dr. Christian and Melanie was also a gift. Almost every week I would ride to work with Dr. Christian and while he was in surgery, I would sit in the waiting room and work on email and my writing. It was usually the most productive day of my week.
During the 90-minute ride there and back we had great talks, discussing many of the theological questions Dr. Christian had, as well as doing Bible reading and talking about apologetics. After a year of this he said, “Now I believe. I believe that God exists, that the Bible is true and that Jesus died for my sins. But I’m not ready to surrender my life to Him; at present I have no impetus to do so.”
“Ok…..” I said, “I will treat you as a believer and we’ll move into discipleship lessons. God will bring you across the line when you are ready.” And so God did more than a year later when, in response to a crisis, Dr. Christian prayed on his own to accept Christ as Savior and Lord. We all rejoiced at God’s faithfulness in answering our prayers.
Picture: Dr. Christian and family
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