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Growth and Turmoil, 1981

 
In 1981 we began to get new recruits for our team. First came two single women. Betty had spent thirteen years in Iran and since she couldn’t go back because of the revolution of 1979, she decided to join us. She proved to be a very helpful person with all the experience she had had. Her roommate Dolly came with no overseas experience and proved to be the opposite of Betty, unfortunately and in the end I had to send her home.
 
These two new teammates began to come to John with requests. Betty suggested that we have a weekly team prayer meeting. Dorothy wanted more help with language. John, however, was too engrossed in his work with the foundation to listen to them. He brushed off their requests by giving his philosophy of leadership, learned as a sergeant in the Air Force: “I make the decisions, you follow.”
 
As a result, Betty and Dorothy began to come to me with their requests, questions and desires, making me the de facto leader of the team. This put me in an awkward position, and stirred up some conflict between John and myself. However, after some discussion, he agreed to having a team prayer meeting and to meet other desires of the team.
 
In April of 1980 a family with two children joined us. Dan and Nancy were self-sufficient pioneer types and fit in well. Little did Dan know that within six weeks of arrival he would become both the field leader and team leader, but he was the type of man who could rise to the challenge.
 
Since the foundation was now fully established, in April John suggested that he and I apply for work and residence permits through it. That way we could put all our time and effort into ministry instead of having to work at teaching English, too. With great hopes we made our applications. The police accepted them willingly and told us they would let us know when to pick up our permits.
 
Several weeks later in May the police sent a notice for us to come. We went with the expectation of receiving the permits we’d applied for, but were shocked to learn that not only were our applications denied, but that we had only twenty-four hours to leave the country! We were to be escorted to the border and deported!
 
After some intense discussion with John, the police granted us two weeks to wrap things up before having to leave. John asked the reason for our deportation, The police said they couldn’t tell us the reason for our expulsion because it was “top secret!”
 
Later we found out that in the report from the Black Sea Coast, the police accused us of collecting money from the villagers instead of giving them help. And what was their version of why we were “collecting” money? To help Jimmy Carter! Amazingly convoluted thinking.
 
This was our introduction to the wide-spread conspiracy-thinking of locals. There actually are a lot of conspiracies at work among locals, so they assume that others also operate with secret agendas.
 
Our expulsion was a grave turn of events: instead of settling in with solid residence permits, it looked like our time in our new country was coming to an early end.
 
The next two weeks were very full. At the time we had visitors from our group: a fellow who came to make a film for us and a prospective new worker. They joined in on our discussions about the future work in the country.
 
John tried to think of how to keep everything going while he was away and of how to anticipate all that could happen and prepare for it. The rest of us felt he should let go and turn things over to those who remained. There was some tension in those meetings, but in the end John wisely gave up trying to do it all and turned his attention to getting ready to leave.
We decided to make our required exit but then try to come back as soon as possible and see what would happen. We weren’t going to give up so easily.
 
There was not only our own household to think of, but also the three children staying with us. Dan and Nancy agreed to take the two girls, and a responsible single German woman moved into our apartment to watch little Solomon. It was good to have such team help to rely on.
 
In the end, the police decided not to send an escort with us to the border, which was not at all a disappointment to us. We set off one fine June day, heading to Bulgaria instead of Greece. This seemed to be a shorter way than the one we’d originally come on and we could return through Greece, where the border guards may not have received news of our expulsion.
 
We were pleasantly surprised at the Bulgarian border to find that no news had been given to them about our exit or about our being expelled. We didn’t volunteer any information either and made a smooth exit.
 
Communist-controlled Bulgaria had the feel of a large prison. We were not allowed to stop anywhere other than for gas. It seemed to be much more oppressive than Yugoslavia.
 
On this trip we established a pattern that we followed on the subsequent nine trips by car to or from Germany. We drove the whole first day and stayed overnight somewhere near the border. Then we drove all the second day, all that night and then arrived on the third day in Southern Germany. We often stopped there for a break at the Word of Life castle on Starnberger Lake.
 
On this trip, the Lord had a wonderful surprise for us at the castle, a lovely God sighting: there was a reunion of students from Barbara’s Bible school taking place. It was a very refreshing time for her after the stress of being expelled and making the long trip.
 
Barbara’s parents were glad to have us back. And they were appalled that we wanted to return to such an uncertain situation, but after one initial attempt, they didn’t try to dissuade us.
 
One of my major tasks was to re-register the car in Germany; losing my residence permit in meant that my foreign car license plate was now invalid.
 
Registering the car went well. The next task was to take the license plates to a Consulate and turn them in. The man there accepted them and gave me a little paper saying that I surrendered them. I looked at the paper, and hesitated.
 
“I think there should be some kind of stamp on this paper,” I said.
“No, I don’t think so,” he replied, “this should be enough.”
“Well, I’ve been in your country long enough to know that a paper without an official stamp is pretty useless,” I said. “Please put a stamp on it.”
The man sighed. “Alright,” he said and taking the paper, he stamped it and signed over the stamp. “There, now you have what you want.”
 
It turned out that having that stamp on the paper was absolutely critical to our reentry. The Lord had guided
 
Picture below: little Solomon with Nat

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Psalm 22:25

 
Psalm 22:25 “From you comes the theme of my praise in the great assembly; before those who fear you will I fulfill my vows.”
 
[You, O Lord, are the praiseworthy One, the great Shepherd, our good God, our kind King, the One to be obeyed no matter what. You are the ultimate in Leadership, the true and only God. “For who is God save the LORD? or who is a rock save our God?” (Psa. 18:31).
 
I thank you, Lord Jesus, for the privilege and wonder of memorizing and meditating on your Word, so I can go over it as I lay in bed or walk or drive, soaking in the richness of truth, the beauty of your mind, the power of your perspective.
 
You are great and gracious and good; I thank you for your wonderful love and care, for your guidance and direction.
“The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower. I will call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from my enemies (Psa. 18:2-3).
 
I praise you for your marvelous Character: pristine, pure, perfect, powerful, prolific, the paragon of all positives. You are worthy of worship no matter what my circumstances. You are the God of goodness, who is great in glory and the Giver of all grace. “I will love you, O LORD, my strength” (Psa. 18:1).
 
May you rule in my life today, may I walk in paths of righteousness, responding to the leading of your Spirit as He uses the Word in me. May you be exalted by my motives, honored with my responses and gratified with my obedience. May your name be lifted up before all those around.]
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Psalm 22:22-24

 
Psalm 22:22 “I will declare your name to my brothers; in the congregation I will praise you.”
 
[You, Heavenly Father, are the prayer-answering, all-wise, infinitely powerful, all-good God, worthy of praise. You are Yahweh, Elohim and Adonai, the God of perfect character, marvelous wisdom, rich love, unending righteousness and immeasurable power. Yes, before all I will declare your name and praise you!]
 
Psalm 22:23 “You who fear the LORD, praise him!”
 
[To fear the Lord is to stand in awe of His power and greatness, His hatred of sin and love of righteousness; it is to care deeply what He thinks about things, and therefore obey Him wholeheartedly and fully.]
 
“All you descendants of Jacob, honor him! Revere him, all you descendants of Israel!”
 
[To honor and revere you with enthusiasm and joy, Lord God, are the responses of those who spend time in worship and in your Word. They can see your beautiful and majestic Character, the eternal, Triune Ruler and Perfect One.]
 
Psalm 22:24 “For he has not despised or disdained the suffering of the afflicted one;
 
[You, Father, planned Jesus’ suffering, knowing that it was necessary for Him to be the perfect Savior: “Because [Jesus] himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted” (Heb. 18).
 
Jesus “endured the cross, despising the shame and is set down at the right hand of God” (Heb. 12:4). You valued His suffering because you knew it was necessary; Jesus was able to reject the shame of his suffering because He looked forward to what it would do in saving many and giving His Father glory.
 
You are also aware of the suffering of your children, ever giving us the grace needed to move through persecution and problems with power to become more like Christ. Help us to not despise or disdain the suffering you allow into our lives, but to look beyond it in joy to what it will accomplish in our lives and to the honor it will bring to you as we respond in faith.]
 
“he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help.”
 
[You came in at the right time and rescued Jesus, not from the cross, but from the grave. You are the absolutely reliable One, as we see in your repeatedly helping David when he called out to you, “This poor man cried and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles” (Ps. 34:6).
 
And you do the same in our lives when we flee to you for help: “The angel of the Lord encamps round about those who fear him and delivers them” (Psalm 34:7).
 
As David so confidently states in Psalm 34:8, “Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him.” Help us to consistently run to you, Lord, for refuge in each situation, to fear you, not men, to trust you, not ourselves.]
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The Greatness of our God

Praise you, dear Lord God, that in your gracious goodness, you unfailingly guide and direct, provide for and protect us. Praise you for the completeness of your character, the perfection of your personality, the graciousness of your goodness, and the firmness of your faithfulness.
 
Thank you that you lead us through difficulties, darkness and disappointments, using each to deepen, mature, chasten and develop us. You are wise beyond words, knowing exactly what is right, always doing what is best, and working out what is wonderful, no matter how it may appear to us.
 
I praise you, Lord, that whatever comes today, I can thank you for it. Confidence in you is never misplaced, praise is always appropriate, trust is always right.
 
To you now I lift my heart and soul in praise, for you are worthy of it in your perfect power, wonderful wisdom, lavish love, great goodness and flawless faith, in your strong sternness and touching tenderness. Every quality needed is there in the exact amount and in perfect balance: mercy triumphs over justice, forgiveness conquers condemnation, love covers a multitude of sins.
 
You are our marvelous Master, our good God, perfect Father, loving Lord, and supreme Shepherd. You are far better than any god we could make up: in our flawed thinking, anything we could produce would also be faulty, like the Greeks’ human-like sinful gods.
 
Thankfully you are completely different, far beyond any human conception: perfect and eternal, wise and good. You are light, love and life yourself. Your essence is totally other than that of your creation—both uncorrupted and incorruptible–and for that we are thankful.
 
Praise be to you forever and ever. Your faithfulness is the reason we can praise you before anything comes to pass, for you are fully sovereign and, completely good and totally powerful, easily able to allow or prevent whatever you desire. It is a certainty that you will bring to us what is right and best.
 
Praise you for our weakness in the events before us now, and for the strength you will use for good in our lives. We give you glory, honor and praise now for what you will do today, tomorrow, next year and forever. You are Lord, you are God, you are worthy. Amen.
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The Secret Life of Walter M. Christian, Part 2

A continuation of how one man keeps on and uses the armor of Ephesians 6:10-18
On the way home Walter sat quietly on the train looking out the window, polishing his sword by meditating on the passage he’d been memorizing. A billboard swept into view, featuring a semi-clad girl. Although Walter quickly looked away, he’d already been hit with a dart of lust and was taken down.
He immediately sprang up and pulled the dart out with confession: “Look at what I just thought, Lord. I agree with you that it is totally selfish, destructive, and caustic to my soul. It is pleasing to Satan and grievous to you. I repent and ask your forgiveness, especially for grieving you, you who love me so much.”
Then he went on the offensive and in the powerful name of Jesus withdrew any ground he’d given to the enemy in this attack, asking God to fill him again with the Spirit.
Just in case any more such attacks came on the way home, he kept his shield of faith up by thanking God for all that had happened during the day–and he decided not to stare out the window any more.
When he came in the door at home, the kids were arguing and his exasperated wife welcomed him with, “Well, I’m glad you’re finally home. See if you can do something with these three fighters!”
Walter skillfully got his shield up as the dart of anger flew at him, followed by one of self-justification. “I was hoping for a better reception and some peaceful interaction, Lord–but I thank you for the chance to fulfill the role you have for me in serving and protecting my wife, and of helping my 3 boys learn to follow you!” Both darts hit the shield and were extinguished.
But then the dragon of selfishness took a swipe at him and almost knocked the shield out of Walter’s hand. He quickly came around with his sword, “I praise you, Lord, that I can keep my eyes on you; I confess my desire to do my own thing here and have some ‘well deserved relaxation’ before supper, but as your disciple I’m called to deny myself, take up my cross and follow you. I thank you for the chance to obey you in this moment.” This sent the dragon squealing in retreat.
Walter strode to the kids and scooped two of them up in his arms. “Hi Dad,” they shouted. “Can we go to the park for a while before supper?”
“Sure!” Walter replied. “Get you shoes and coats on.”
The three little bodies scurried to the hall while Walter went to the kitchen and gave his wife a hug. “Hard day, huh?”
“Sure was! I wish I had a quiet and easy life like yours!”
Walter smiled as he deftly raised up his shield with his left hand to quench the flaming arrow of competitiveness, wanting to tell her how hard his day had been. Resting his right hand on his sword, he thought, “If you only knew!” He kissed his wife gently and turned to take the kids to the park.
For more information on using the armor see:
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The Secret Life of Walter M. Christian, Part 1

 
The story of how one man My Relationship with Otherskeeps on and uses the armor of Ephesians 6:10-18
 
Walter ran up the last few steps and walked swiftly to the door. He didn’t want to be late for work and unnecessarily bring any negative attention to himself from the boss.
 
Suddenly he stopped. “Wait! I don’t have my helmet of salvation on! I’m looking for security from others and their opinions, not God.” He put on the helmet with a quick prayer, “Lord I confess I’m walking in the fear of men and repent! Help me to rest in you and your approval.”
 
He took a deep breath, opened the door and entered the office. Sure enough, there was the boss waiting for him; but instead of dread or a sinking feeling, Walter now had his helmet on and rested in the truth of who he was–a Child of God, a Prince whose real work was joining God in His great plans.
 
“Ah, Walter,” said the boss, towering over his diminutive employee. “How’s it going with the coding on that new project? It’s really important that we make our deadline on this one!”
 
Walter calmly adjusted his glasses and blinked up at his boss. “It’s going well. In fact, I’m ahead of schedule and have the whole thing mapped out. I should be done by the end of the week.”
 
“Great!” replied his boss, smiling. “Keep up the good work.” Walter nodded and headed to his cubical where he hung his coat over his chair and got down to work.
 
Walter was well into his coding when something caught his attention. At first he thought maybe he’d imagined it, but no, there it was again: a movement in the back of his mind. He reached for his sword and shield and swung around just in time to face his foe, the dragon of jealousy.
 
The hot flames of the dragon’s breath swept over him, reminding him of how he’d been passed over for that promotion he’d wanted and a less experienced guy had gotten it–but Walter kept up his shield, offering the sacrifice of thanksgiving, warding off the flames, “Thank you, Lord, that I didn’t get that promotion, thank you for your care and protection in all.”
 
He brought his sword up, slashing with skill at the dragon’s vulnerable areas: “You, Lord, are sovereign, and if getting that promotion had been good for me, you would have given it. I can praise you for not allowing me to have it, for your Word says, ‘The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.’”
 
The dragon drew back and stumbled off into the brush. Walter leaned on his sword, panting. He wiped the soot from the dragon’s flames off his face, reminding himself, “My soul finds rest in God alone. He only is my rock and my salvation.”
 
Then he heard a twang and whirled around, raising his shield in one smooth motion, intercepting the flaming arrow of self-pity. “Thank you, Lord, that you cause my cup to overflow, and lead me in paths of righteousness; I thank you for what you give and what you withhold, for you are good and wise and loving. I can trust you in this situation.” The arrow thunked into his shield and sizzled out.
 
Walter waited for another attack, but when nothing stirred, he went back to his coding, glad that he’d kept his armor on with his sword and shield handy.
 
The rest of the morning went well, but later in the afternoon, there came another sneak attack. Things weren’t progressing as fast as he’d planned, with some unforeseen glitches arising that he’d have to solve.
 
He was somewhat unhappy with himself for not anticipating these problems. As a result, his breastplate was hanging awry and he didn’t get his shield up in time, so a flaming arrow of worry was able to strike him in his chest. He immediately felt the poison of anxiety begin to seep into his heart.
 
He reached up and pulled out the arrow with the glove of confession and threw it down. “Lord, forgive me for not trusting you; you promise to lead me through whatever comes, even if it’s the valley of the shadow of death–so I can trust you to help me work out these issues. As it says in Psalm 86:7, ‘I will call upon you in the day of my trouble, for you will answer me.’ I praise you now for how you will guide in overcoming these obstacles in my work.”
 
Stamping out the still smoldering arrow with his shoes of peace, Walter put some truth-salve from Psalm 62:5 on his wound “My soul, find rest in God alone, for my hope comes from Him. He only is my rock, my salvation and my high tower. I will never be shaken.” That quickly lessened the pain and he was able to think clearly again and get back to his work.
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Psalm 22:19-21

Psalm 22:19 “But you, O LORD, be not far off;”
 
[You, Heavenly Father, only turned away from Jesus as long as was necessary; when His suffering was complete, you turned back and raised Him from the dead, gloriously defeating all your foes.
 
And because you, Lord Jesus, were willing to be abandoned on the cross while becoming sin for us, you can say to us, “I will never leave you or forsake you” (Heb. 13;5 ESV). Praise be to you, Lord God, that you are always near, always ready to help in grace, wisdom and power.]
 
“O my Strength, come quickly to help me.”
 
[You, Heavenly Father came with strength and help, defeating death by raising Christ. And you are my strength, Lord Jesus, the Source of all good, the Provider of powerful protection, my righteous rock and faithful fortress.
 
Praise you that you give us help at the right time and in the right way. And praise you that while waiting, we can be worshiping, trusting and thanking you before any answer comes–because you, Lord, are gloriously faithful!]
 
Psalm 22:20, 21“Deliver my life from the sword, my precious life from the power of the dogs. Rescue me from the mouth of the lions; save me from the horns of the wild oxen.”
 
[You did just that for Jesus, and for us. Praise you that whatever form the enemy’s attacks take, you, Lord, can and will deliver us in your time and way. No one and nothing is strong enough to overcome you.
 
You let through only the attacks that you will use for good in our lives, for strengthening our faith, for putting to death our wrong desires, our natural responses and selfish goals, while giving us a platform for sharing with others about you.
 
You are the perfect coach, putting us through the experiences that will equip, mature, prepare and train us for righteousness and faith.
 
Praise be to you, the Most High, King of Kings, Lord of Love, God of Goodness, Savior of sinners. Before you I now bow down in surrender. Help me to rise up to live in trust, obedience, praise and thanksgiving throughout today. Amen.
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Coups and Cops

In early September, 1980, we were looking for a larger bed for Nat and heard of one for sale out at the Middle Eastern Technical University campus, so we planned to go out there early in the morning to pick it up.
 
But, as we were getting ready at 6 am, there was a knock on the door. Barbara answered it, and came back looking very pleased.
 
“What is it?” I asked,
 
“There was a military coup last night,” she said. “The landlord’s son said we can’t leave the house until further notice. I’m going back to bed!” She was the happiest prisoner I’d ever seen.
 
At three in the afternoon, we got word that we were allowed to go out and buy bread if we wanted to, so the boys and I went. We were startled to see a tank at the end of our street was with its 50-caliber machine gun loaded and pointed our way!
 
From the corner we looked down the hill and at the entrance to every side street there were soldiers in full battle dress with loaded rifles standing guard.
 
We learned that during the night 10,000 people had been arrested, including all the leading political figures. Martial law had been declared, the parliament dissolved and all political parties closed.
 
In that one night the country went from being perhaps the most dangerous one in the world to the safest, with all known criminals taken in, along with a lot of innocent people. Many, probably most, were tortured to get information and a number of them died. For those arrested it was a brutal time of transition.
 
For those of us left at home, the coup certainly made things better for daily living: no more bombs, no more machine gun fights, no more dogs barking in the night, and a gradual end to the shortages in the stores. How it would affect our work of sharing the gospel remained to be seen.
We continued partnering with John on the foundation work. One of his desires was to either set up an orphanage or work through local orphanages, so we made regular visits to some in the city.
 
On one visit, John met a woman outside the orphanage door who said she had brought her three children to put them in the orphanage because she could no longer care for them. On an impulse John said he would take them if she’d sign the papers. She agreed, and John came home with three new children.
 
His wife said she could not handle this responsibility, so John came to us and asked if we would take them in.
Unwise as we now see it, at the time we agreed. So, our little family suddenly grew from four to seven, as the two girls, nine and seven, and their three-year-old brother, Solomon, moved in.
 
This made for interesting dynamics. These children had experienced little discipline in their lives, didn’t know about the basics of life—they ate with their hands, had never seen a sit-down toilet, and were suddenly thrust into the home of foreigners who spoke the local language very imperfectly. It turned out that their grasp of the local language was also pretty poor; they spoke a different, minority language as their mother tongue.
 
Explaining to those girls why I was disciplining their spoiled little brother proved to be a daunting task. Young boys in this culture are considered little kings, given anything they want. Solomon’s older sisters wanted to protect him from my attempts to teach him what “no” meant. It was an interesting time.
 
For Josh and Nat, this “live-in language and culture exposure” was a good thing. Nat and Solomon were about the same age, but very contrasting in their looks: Nat very blond, Solomon very dark, our chocolate/vanilla pair. They played well together and became good friends.
 
We also took in a German girl in her twenties who was supposed to help us with our new family additions, but being a rebel, she turned out to be as much trouble as the children!
 
Another idea of John’s was to have the foundation distribute help to poor villagers on the Black Sea coast. Charles had contacts there so it was a natural place to start. In January, the three of us drove up, entered one of the villages, and began giving out used clothes and financial help to those in need.
 
After a few hours of distribution, an army officer and four soldiers appeared and began to ask John questions. In the end the officer decided to take us to the police.
 
John, Charles, and I got into the car, along with two soldiers carrying their loaded rifles and drove to the police station in the nearest city. There we were informed that we were under arrest, the first of a number of times this was to happen to me.
 
We actually spent a pleasant afternoon at the police station drinking lots of tea and giving the policemen English lessons while waiting for some “higher ups” to arrive. We were being accused of collecting money for Jimmy Carter!
 
The time proved to be good language study for me. I easily learned a number of new words, including the sentence, “you have been arrested.”
 
In the end, after John gave his statement, and some of the irate villagers we’d helped came to speak on our behalf, the police decided to let us go. Hopefully the authorities could now see that we were doing good and accept our innocence!
 
That night I had trouble sleeping. At first I thought it was from the excitement of the day, and then realized it was from the innumerable cups of strong tea we’d consumed!
 
When we got back home, I found that our German girl had contracted hepatitis A. We called the doctor another worker recommended and he agreed to come and give us shots to protect us from infection.
 
Dr. Alsan arrived with his big glass syringe and vials of medicine. We were glad to hear that he definitely believed in germs and were pleased that he insisted we boil the syringe and needles before using them. No one got an infection, in contrast to when we’d gotten other injections here.
 
Along with all these events, we continued on with language study and slowly made progress.
 
The picture below is Nat with the children of my language helper. I am on a trip at the moment and will send you a picture of Nat and Solomon when I get home.
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Psalm 22:12-18

 
This next section of Psalm 22 is a series of amazing prophetic declarations, describing what would happen to Jesus 1000 years after it was written; it details the happenings of a crucifixion long before that cruel method of execution was devised. Truly God knows all that will come and reveals to us what we need to know.
 
Psalm 22:12,13 “Many bulls surround me; strong bulls of Bashan encircle me. Roaring lions tearing their prey open their mouths wide against me.”
 
[Satan and his forces, using the unbelieving rulers of Israel and the powerful Gentile Roman forces, sought to devour Christ, seemingly defeating Him with death.]
 
Psalm 22:14, 15 “I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint. My heart has turned to wax; it has melted away within me. My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death.”
 
[Here is the clear prophetic description of Christ’s crucifixion, with bones out of joint, with extreme thirst, with His heart melting from anguish and grief, ending with His death and burial.
 
What a wonder for us, Lord God to see how you, living outside of time, can describe what doesn’t yet exist in such precise detail. Your knowledge is deep, detailed, wonderful and marvelous, showing us the greatness of your character, the might of your wisdom and the grace of your revelation!]
 
Psalm 22:16 “Dogs have surrounded me; a band of evil men has encircled me,”
 
[The gentile Romans empowered by the faithless Jewish rulers brought Him to execution.]
 
“they have pierced my hands and my feet.”
 
[In crucifying you, they did exactly this.]
 
Psalm 22:17 “I can count all my bones;”
 
[your bones stuck out as you were stretched and pulled on the cross.]
 
“people stare and gloat over me.”
 
[ “the rulers even sneered at him. They said, ‘He saved others; let him save himself if he is God’s Messiah, the Chosen One'” (Luke 22:35).]
 
Psalm 22:18 “They divide my garments among them and cast lots for my clothing.”
 
[And the soldiers did exactly that, casting lots for your garment. The detail of prediction here is astounding, Lord. Praise you for your desire to share this with us, to show us how your knowledge and wisdom are limitless, always at work, waiting for the right time, bringing what is best to pass.
 
You, Lord Jesus, knew from before creation that you would have to suffer these things in order to redeem the universe, and still you went ahead and created all.
 
Your love and goodness are astounding. Therefore you are worthy of trust, of honor, of glory and worship. You know every detail of what will come in my day today and will orchestrate it for good, for growth, for glory-giving.
 
Therefore to you I bow, to you I give praise now for what will come; to you I give my life; I rise up now to obey you, to be a glory-giver, to honor you in thought, word and deed. Help me in this, for I can only do this in your grace and strength. You, Lord, are my all.]
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The Wonder of Worship

 
As you lead me into worship each day, Lord Jesus, there is a definite sense of solidification within, a strengthening in my inner being, for are “strengthening me with strength in my soul” (Psa. 136:8). I am more at rest in you; my confidence is shifting from other sources to you; there is a growing sense of firm faith in you which stands against my common sins of self-pity, impatience, discontent and fear.
 
Worship (praising you for who you are) brings transformation as I gaze on your greatness: “…we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2. Cor. 3:18).
 
Worship of you, Lord, shines into my being the light of your character—positive, pure, powerful, passionate, and perfect—and you use it like a laser beam, shining deep into the recesses of my soul, exposing the filth of sin, burning away dross, purifying, healing, and guiding me into confession, repentance and the filling of the Spirit.
 
One result of worship–extolling you for your power and might, sovereignty and wisdom, omniscience and omnipresence–is that my being weak is no longer something to be feared and despised. It has become like a lens, focusing my attention on you, Lord God, and your mighty, loving, wise personality, waiting for you to act in each situation.
 
I praise you for the great love you have for us, leading you to work so patiently, so graciously, so faithfully, so persistently, even when I tend to focus elsewhere on the trinkets and trash of earth, on selfishness and security, on busyness and business.
 
Your goodness persists through all, Lord, and I am so thankful that you do not give up on me, but, as I spend time in worship, you are continually bringing me into a wider place as my first love for you grows. Spending that daily time with you is so good, so powerful, so transforming, like your sunshine on these yellow flowers. I praise and thank you for keeping me consistent in it, keeping my passion for you burning and my obedience flowing.
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