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Psalm 31:19-20

 
 
Psalm 31:19 “How great is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you,”
 
[“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with ALL spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ Jesus” (Eph. 1:3).
 
You, O Lord, know the future and all that will come; you know what is needed for us to stand, and have prepared a rich supply of grace for us. Your one requirement is that we trust you–fear you, stand in awe of you–rather than fear men who speak loudly and destructively.]
 
“How great is your goodness…which you bestow in the sight of men on those who take refuge in you.”
 
[As we hide ourselves in you, Lord, you bless us clearly, publicly, visibly. You give grace and peace, you supply our needs, you carry us through difficulties, you protect us from danger (how often have you preserved me in near accidents on the road), you empower us to be more than conquerors rather than just coping.
 
We can hide in you mainly through thinking the truth of your Word and responding in praise and thanksgiving for what you allow. I give you praise now for your wisdom and goodness as you go before to guide, protect and deliver.]
 
Psalm 31:20 “In the shelter of your presence you hide them from the intrigues of men; in your dwelling you keep them safe from accusing tongues.”
 
[To others we may appear to be defenseless and totally vulnerable, but in your unseen presence we are sheltered and shielded. Our responsibility is to stay in your presence, in your refuge of truth, in your Word of wisdom: “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty” (Ps. 91:1).
 
This means that, in the midst of much pressure, we can trust you, praise you and respond to evil with what we know to be right: forgiving, returning good for hurt, resting in the truth that you are doing good in what appears to be bad.
 
Then, because you delight in us, in your mighty power you will protect us, work to guide and direct us and bring us out into a spacious place. To you be glory and honor, Lord for your goodness, power and love. Help me to dwell in them, rest in them and rejoice in them.]
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Psalm 31:17-18

 
Psalm 31:17 “Let me not be put to shame, O LORD, for I have cried out to you;”
[You, O Lord, desire honor for us, not shame: “As God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved,” “…my salvation and honor depend on God, my mighty rock and refuge” (Col. 3:12, Ps. 62:7).
So we can be confident that, as we bow before you and live for you, you will act in your faithfulness, in your goodness, and in your kindness to save us from shame.
 
Help us to have Jesus’ attitude, “For the joy that was set before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame…” (Heb. 12:2] I praise you now for how you will act in the difficult situations before me to protect me from shame and bring both resolution and honor.]
Psalm 31:17b,18 “but let the wicked be put to shame and lie silent in the grave. Let their lying lips be silenced, for with pride and contempt they speak arrogantly against the righteous.”
[There are so many lies and false accusations uttered these days against followers of Jesus–even to the point of calling us terrorists! Doing good is denigrated; committing evil is exalted. I praise you, Lord, that in the midst of this, you are at work and will use the attacks of the enemy to advance your Kingdom.
And I thank you for your guidance on how to respond to these verbal attacks. Instead of feeling sorry for ourselves and being consumed with anger, frustration and discouragement, you call us to “delight in weaknesses, hardships, INSULTS, persecutions and difficulties, for when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Cor. 12:10). We can, in humility, in your perspective, shrug off the shame people want to put on us, walking instead in the light of the honor you heap on us as your beloved children.
Praise you, Lord, that these situations are opportunities to give you glory through trust, praise and doing good to those who do evil to us. May we so walk in faith, bringing you great honor before all the unseen hosts.]
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Psalm 31:15-16

Psalm 31:15 “My times are in your hands;”
 
[A strong declaration of God’s great powers, of His sovereignty at work–and of our weakness. We cannot control our times, our lives or the events that come into them, but God actively, intimately and lovingly works to bring to us what is best for us–both in the big picture and in the tiny details. This is a further reason to trust Him fully through praise before any answer to our cry comes.
 
As it says in Psalm 33:18-20 “…the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield.”]
 
Psalm 31:15b-16, “deliver me from my enemies and from those who pursue me. Let your face shine on your servant; save me in your unfailing love.”
 
[David unwaveringly looks to the right place, to the right One for help, and for the right reason: God’s unfailing love. He is confident that God is going to answer. As David said in Psalm 27:13-14 “I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.”
 
[And David consistently saw God’s protection and provision. He was in dozens, if not hundreds of battles, with no mention of ever being wounded. And he died of old age in his bed, having seen God’s deliverance all through his life.
 
Praise you, Lord God, that no matter how bad things appear, you are going to bring positive and constructive happenings out of them as we join you in faith.
 
I give thanks, Lord God, for your care and protection, your grace-filled help in each difficulty, and for your allowing challenges into our lives to deepen, mature and equip us.
 
Help us to keep our eyes on you this day. I bow before you, O Lord God, wanting to give you the honor due your Name by offering the sacrifice of thanksgiving in all.]
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Psalm 31:

Psalm 31:9 “Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress;”
 
[You, Lord, are the One I should flee to immediately when anxiety and fear, worry and distress strike, for you alone have the power to do something about it.
 
You are the mighty and merciful One, you are gracious and good, you are wise and wonderful. Praise you for how you will help us in our situations, few of which could be more distressing than David’s, which he describes in the verses below. His distress involved every area of his life, emotional and physical, social and positional:]
 
Psalm 31:9b-12 “my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. My life is consumed by anguish and my years by groaning; my strength fails because of my affliction, and my bones grow weak. Because of all my enemies, I am the utter contempt of my neighbors; I am a dread to my friends—those who see me on the street flee from me. I am forgotten by them as though I were dead;”
 
[What a devastating picture of severe distress, but allowed by you, Lord, for you were at work through it, doing significant things in David’s life. And so you are at work in our lives as we move into and through difficult times. In these we can trust you, no matter how painful they may be, as David goes on to describe.]
 
Psalm 31:12b-13 “I have become like broken pottery. For I hear the slander of many; there is terror on every side; they conspire against me and plot to take my life.”
 
[David was weak and vulnerable, surrounded by threats, assaulted by fears and attacked by men, in real danger of death. He was in the fire. It looks bad. However, the next words, words of choice, make all the difference:]
 
Psalm 31:14 “BUT I trust in you, O LORD;”
 
[In spite of his circumstances, in spite of how he felt, in spite of the very real dangers, in spite of getting no answers yet, David makes the choice to trust in Jehovah, the great and holy God, to expect help from Him based on His perfect character and wide wisdom.
 
In using the word “BUT,” David chooses to reject the natural tendency to let his feelings, thoughts and circumstances rule him, saying instead,]
 
“I say, ‘You are my God.’”
 
[He affirms that the Lord is his God, his final authority. This is looking away from the seen to the unseen. It is a declaration that Jesus is David’s final authority and David is going to trust Him and obey Him, not feelings; he chooses spiritual facts over fear. David is submitting his intellect and perceptions to the higher authority of Scripture.]
 
And this is what you call us to do, too, Lord God. When we are in the fire, this is the response of faith, “But, I trust in you, O LORD!”
 
What a privilege to be able to think and act in faith in the face of fears. Thereby we can bring you great honor, demonstrating to all around us the power of your grace, the wisdom of your way and the support of your Spirit.
 
Help us to be honest before you about how we feel, lifting our souls to you, God, while always ending with “But, I trust in you, Lord!”
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More from Chapter 63

On March 12, the police again came to our house while I was at school and left a message for me to come to their headquarters.
When I got home from teaching, we gathered up any papers the police might consider incriminating and put them into a brief case. I told Barbara to take it and go to someone else’s house just in case the police came to search ours. Then I went to the police headquarters.
I was surprised to see my coworker Jean there, too. The police took down our identity information and then led us out to a van and drove to my house. I was not concerned about this since we’d already made our preparations.
However, when we arrived and went in, I was shocked and then angry to find that Barbara was still there! She remained calm, however, and after letting us in, while the police were looking through the apartment, she picked up the brief case and walked out. No one stopped or questioned her! I was relieved. A three-star God sighting.
After going to Jean’s house for the same routine, we returned to the police headquarters where they put us in a large cell. Again we were surprised: there was Orin!
For most of us who were rounded up that day, this was the first time to be arrested and the first time to be put in a cell. There was a lot of uncertainty, and therefore fear. Since we all knew that beatings and torture were a standard part of police interrogation, this threat was hanging over each of us.
The policeman who placed us in the cell pointed to a man standing in the middle of the room. “Do not talk with him; he is to stand there for twenty-four hours so he will come to himself and tell us what he knows!”
That may not seem like much of a torture, but think about what it means to have to stand in one place for twenty-four hours: no sleep, no food, no water, no chance to go to the bathroom, no rest for your tired legs and feet. That is a very effective “white” torture, breaking down one’s resistance.
I thought to myself, “Is that just a command, or are you really telling us what will happen to us if we don’t give you the information you expect to get from us?”
As the evening wore on, the police brought in more believers, including Elvina and my former student, Sam. The women were kept on the police side of the cell bars and were given chairs to sit on.
Our cell was sparsely furnished: just one park bench. If they kept us for the night, we would obviously have to sleep on the cement floor.
Sam and I had an appointment for a discipleship lesson that evening, so we sat on the park bench and did our study right there. We were not allowed any personal possessions like a Bible in jail, but this didn’t hamper us at all. Sam’s assignment had been to memorize half a chapter in the NT and we just did our lesson on that chapter.
During this time, a policeman came and took Orin away. When he was back an hour later, he was white as a sheet and shaking. The policeman who brought him in warned us sternly not to talk to him. Later he was able to tell us that he had been beaten, mostly in his chest area, and was in pain.
What a shame that such a gentle, kind, gracious person should be subjected to that kind of treatment. The physical damage done in that brief time would stay with him for the next three years.
Around 10 pm I decided to lay down and get what sleep I could. I had never slept directly on a cement floor before, and I was not surprised at how uncomfortable it was. This was accentuated by not having any pillow.
I also discovered that lying on my side was the most uncomfortable position, because the seam of my blue jeans cut into my leg.
After a while the Lord gave me the idea to take off my shoes, put them together and use them for a pillow. Then, lying on my back and putting my arm over my eyes to shut out the bright lights, I was finally able to fall asleep.
Sometime in the night I was awakened by a policeman nudging me with his foot.
“Come with me,” he said gruffly. I climbed stiffly to my feet, put on my shoes and followed him out of the cell door. We went down the hall to a large room. Glancing at the clock on the wall I saw that it was 3 am.
“Sit down there,” ordered the policeman. I took a seat and looked around. There were four men, one of them seated before a typewriter.
Soon a fifth man came in, a man I knew. I had met him in a pastry shop in the squatter housing section of town. He had come over and wanted to practice his English with me.
“Hello,” he said, shaking my hand, “I am here to translate for you.” He was, of course, an undercover policeman. The locals like to joke that every third person is in the employ of the police as an informer. That may not be far from the truth!
First they took my personal information, including my father and mother’s names—an important means of identification here.
Then they began grilling me with one question after another. My translator had a hard time keeping up, as his English was not that strong, so I just started answering in the local language.
They tried to trick me into admitting my “guilt” of using enticements to get people to become Christians. I explained how ridiculous that was; who would trust someone who was willing to change his faith for money or other gain? They hadn’t thought of that.
One policeman demanded, “Give us the names of your students at the university.”
“Sure,” I said, “Henry, John, Jane…”
“No, no, we want their last names, too.”
“I will not give you those. My students have done nothing wrong. They had no say in getting me as a teacher. If I identify them, then you will call them in and it will be on their records for life. No, I will not give you their names.” I folded my arms in a defiant gesture. The police looked at each other and shrugged.
“Ok, tell us what your assignment is in the Believers in Jesus group.”
This question highlighted a mistake that all of us had made in our relations with the police. Since the word “Christian” had negative connotations in this society, conjuring up for most people the image of a drunken, unclean, dishonest, immoral infidel, we wanted a different identity. So the believers had started calling themselves “Believers in Jesus.”
This worked well for everyday relationships, as people would ask us what that meant and we could then fill it with meaning. But with the authorities it was another matter. This society is what I call a “pigeon-hole society,” meaning they have certain accepted categories everyone must fit in. If they can’t put you into one of these, then you are suspect.
“Believers in Jesus” did not fit into any of the existing categories of Catholic, Orthodox or Protestant, so the police put us into the “terrorist” slot. Later we always used “Protestant” with authorities, but the damage was done.
I had read in the newspaper about this conspiracy idea concerning the “Believers in Jesus” group. Later we found that Harry had inadvertently helped develop this by telling the police that each of us had an assignment, like being in charge of video production or indoctrination or literature. The Lord gave me wisdom in answering this particular question so I didn’t incriminate any of us.
All this time the man at the typewriter had been banging away, recording everything that was said. After about two hours of questioning, the lead interrogator turned to him. “Ok, I think we have enough information; give it to him to sign.”
The typist pulled the papers out of his typewriter, three copies with carbon paper, and handed them to me. “Sign here,” he said.
“I can’t sign until I’ve read it.”
“Ok,” he sighed, “read it.”
It had a lot of technical words in it but I got the gist; it did not incriminate me of anything illegal, so I signed it.
I was led back to the cell, glad that I hadn’t been beaten and was ready for some more sleep because I was drained both emotionally and physically.
 Picture: one of my students with me
 
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Psalm 31:2-3

Psalm 31:2 “be my rock of refuge, a strong fortress to save me.”
 
[Praise you, O Lord God, that you are consistently with us: you have made yourself our Refuge by redeeming, adopting and embracing us. You have made yourself our Rock of stability in a world of uncertainty, the personal Refuge of every one of your children. And you are our strong Fortress that we can run into at any time to be protected in whatever way you deem best. We can trust you.]
 
Psalm 31:3 “Since you are my rock and my fortress, for the sake of your name lead and guide me.”
 
[Yes! Because you are my rock and fortress, I have hope! There is help! There is hindrance of my enemy and his plans! You will answer and act for the sake of your holy Name.
 
It is wonderful that we can appeal to you on this basis—for when you lead and guide us, our lives become for you a source of glory and honor, praise and acclaim. May we follow your guidance, thinking of giving you more honor; may we be trusting and obedient so that you may have more glory for your Name.]
 
Psalm 31:4 “Free me from the trap that is set for me, for you are my refuge.”
 
[Based on what you have declared yourself to be, Lord God, we can appeal to you to take us out of the traps of the devil, of evil men and of our own old nature.
 
And so you have done in your mighty act of redemption, opening the door of our cell in the kingdom of darkness and calling us out into the Kingdom of Light. You, Lord Jesus, are greater and more powerful than any opposition and you have, in joining us in our weakness, defeated every enemy in every way.
 
I exalt you, Lord Jesus, my Refuge; I exalt you, O Heavenly Father, my Rock; I exalt you, Holy Spirit, my Guide and Comforter. In you, the great and mighty triune God, I can trust: in you I am safe, in you I am secure.
 
To you be glory in my life today. May you be endlessly honored in my motives, thoughts, desires and words. Amen!
 
Picture from internet by kdsphotos
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Delight

“…delight yourself also in the Lord….” Psalm 37:4
 
I want to delight in you, Lord Jesus–you who were on earth simultaneously both entirely God and entirely man—both finite and fully infinite.
 
You were the Creator and the carpenter. You were the star breather, and the table maker. You were the galaxy former and the sawdust sweeper. You were the history maker and the box builder. You were the one who set up kings and took down tools from your carpenter’s rack. You were the pivotal person in all history and you were the sharpener of chisels. You were the owner of all the universe and lived on the gifts of others.
 
You are unfathomably amazing, wonderfully awe inspiring, fully beyond comprehension. To delight in you is to approach the essence of life, the meaning of existence, the light of eternity.
 
You are sparkling in your purity, generous in your grace, marvelous in your majesty, great in your goodness, dazzling in your wisdom and overwhelming in your greatness.
 
To delight in you is to enter into a fuller reality, to let the shadows of our natural thoughts and values fade into the background, as the light of Truth and Love from your inner beauty shines into our hearts.
 
Such gazing on your beauty brings transformation and joy, a deeper grasp of your acceptance and forgiveness of us, and a solid sense of the security of being your child.
 
You are delightful, you are delectable, you are decidedly wonderful and as I bow before you, all else pales and falls away. Only your gracious, glorious and good presence remains.
 
To know you is so inexpressibly sweet and so overwhelmingly powerful at the same time.
 
I choose to delight in you, Lord Jesus, rejecting the tinsel of this world, along with my pride and self-centered sinfulness. For In you I am forgiven, in you I am cleansed, in you I am accepted, in you I am unconditionally and eternally loved. What more could I want? May you be delighted in every moment.
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Balance

“Teach me Your way, O Lord; I will walk in Your truth; Unite my heart to fear Your name.”
Psalm 86:11
 
God has such an ability to take us right through to the heart of a matter, making us deal with the next area of growth He has for us. As 2002 was drawing to a close, He brought me again face-to-face with my own weakness, imperfection and fallibility. It was another case of “humiliation is the shortcut to humility.”
 
Twice in one weekend I was humiliated by my wrong choices. First I almost killed my whole family by making an impatient, unwise move while driving and only God’s grace kept us from being hit.
 
Then, in doing an act of kindness to our destitute renter, I built a fire in his wood stove and stacked extra wood nearby. However, later as this wood grew warmer, it fell over on the stove and caught fire, almost burning down the house!
 
In both cases God protected us and used my errors for good But it is not easy to let go of my self-image of being competent, wise, effective–which is only half the truth–and instead also see myself as God sees me: poor, needy, weak and faulty.
 
Interestingly my meditation ground at this time has been Psalm 86 where verse one begins, “Bow down and hear me, O God, for I am poor and needy…” How true that is!
 
The psalmist doesn’t stop there, however, but gives the other half of the story: “preserve my soul for I am holy….” It’s hard to keep those two opposing truths in mind: our abject natural spiritual poverty and our shining, glorious acceptance in Christ. Yet the tension between the two is what God uses to keep us balanced.
 
This reminder of my fallibility and dependency on God is very important, and my prayer is that the rest of Psalm 86:1 will be true in my life and yours: “O my God, save your servant who trusts in you.”
 
Prayer: “Lord help me to embrace the humbling, humiliating things that come, to accept that I am weak and needy. And at the same time help me to grasp that in you I am complete, that in Christ I am valued, belong, am competent and useful in your hands. Help me to keep that balance, seeing myself as you do. Amen.”
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Psalm 31

 
 
Praise you, Lord God, that I wake up each morning to your goodness. My experience last night of losing all my luggage, computer included, turned out to be a dream–but I didn’t know that while living it! And this gave me the chance in my dream to offer the sacrifice of thanksgiving and trust you in the midst of loss.
 
Praise you for all the times that you have protected the possessions you have given us, as well as allowing us at times to lose some. You, O Lord, are good and gracious and kind–even if I lose all and have only you, that will be far more than enough! “Whom have I in heaven but you, and earth has nothing I desire besides you!” Psalm 73:25
 
I thank you, Lord, for your care, your compassion, your constant presence. You are the One to be sought continually, to be thought about consistently, to be sought in prayer in every situation. “In the day of my trouble I call to you for you deliver me” (Ps. 86:7).
 
Psalm 31:2 “Turn your ear to me,”
 
[Thank you, Lord Jesus that you listen to us intently, that you have opened the way for us to cry to the Father and that our prayers are consistently heard. Praise you that you are the One who thought up prayer, who hears prayer and answers prayer.]
 
“come quickly to my rescue;”
 
[Praise be to you, Heavenly Father, that in answering prayer, you are never late, never miss the mark, never lose an opportunity. You know the best way to answer, which sometimes means leaving us in our desperation as long as it takes to produce the growth you know we need, the surrender that will open the way for deepening, and the maturing which will enable us to give you more glory.
 
Praise you that you answer out of your wisdom, your love, your grace and your goodness, rather than out of our impatience. Help us to rest in you rather than in getting our way.]
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Chapter 63

Chapter 63 A New Wave of Difficulties
 
As another new year rolled around, we expected more arrests, because at this time of the year the police had less to do. However, January came and went without an incident.
During my semester break in the last week of February, we took a trip to the south for a little vacation. We returned home late Saturday evening to the news that Barbara’s father had died.
The next morning, a Sunday, on the back page of a national newspaper was a long and negative article about Christians in general and me in particular, with a color picture of me, one Burt, the police spy, had taken several years back—he had even previously given me a copy of it. And my name was spelled correctly, very unusual anywhere, but as Burt was meticulous, he had given it accurately.
It was clear that the police had given the information to the newspaper so they could arrest us. We also knew that when a person was arrested, he could be kept for fifteen days without being charged and with no contact with anyone: no lawyer, no phone calls, no rights.
The article said I was corrupting the youth and was trying to get people to become Christians by offering them free English lessons or money or a foreign wife.
Monday morning, I went to the university to talk with my boss about going to Germany for my father-in-law’s funeral. Then I went and bought plane tickets for us all to leave that afternoon.
Shortly after I got home the doorbell rang. I opened it to find a policeman with an invitation for me to go with him to the National Police Headquarters.
In the van waiting for me outside were two other policemen with submachine guns. When we got to the headquarters and they were processing me in, I asked one of them if he had that submachine gun just for me. He smiled, but didn’t answer.
They took me into a large office and began to ask questions about the information in the newspaper. I told what I knew to be true and made clear what was false. I also told them about my father-in-law’s death and our plans to go to Germany for the funeral, showing them my ticket.
“Looks to me like you’re running away because this news article exposed your illegal actions,” said one policeman.
“I could not have planned either the article or my father-in-law’s death,” I said. “I can prove his death with the obituary notice if you want. I have no reason to run away. My home and my work are here.”
That didn’t sway them, and they intentionally kept me just long enough so I missed the plane.
Barbara and I had agreed that if I didn’t come back that she would continue with our plans and fly to Germany that afternoon. As it got closer to the time for her to leave, Barbara called one of our teammates and asked him to take her to the airport. Bless him that he was willing to do so. Most of our teammates understandably didn’t want to come near us since we were politically “hot,” and could possibly be under surveillance. But Richard was willing to be supportive of Barbara, even at risk to himself. It was a stressful time for all of us, and the stress manifested itself in Josh coming down with a fever during the flight.
The next day I went to my travel agent, got my ticket changed and flew off to Germany. We were glad to be together for this important time, and made plans to share some of the gospel with those who would come for the burial.
The funeral was a typical German affair, everyone dressed in black and very somber. Most German Protestants have no assurance of salvation, and rightly so, for they rely on the sacraments of the church to save them.
After a short ceremony in the graveyard chapel, the coffin was carried to the grave and lowered in. Then all the relatives and close friends each tossed three small scoops of earth on the coffin.
Normally at this point everyone leaves, but after we threw our scoops on the coffin, I stepped up and began to speak while Barbara translated.
We talked about how one could be saved and know it, explaining how all the rituals that Protestants normally rely on for grace (baptism as a baby, confirmation, being married in the church and buried by the pastor) were totally inadequate.
We briefly but carefully outlined the gospel and called people to accept the eternal life that Jesus offered.
Years later, some neighbors who came to Christ in their late forties, cited this talk as one factor in their coming to faith.
 
After a week in Germany, we flew back to our adopted country and I resumed my teaching. My students knew of the article in the newspaper and asked me if I were a missionary. That word in their language is a very negative term, indicating someone with a political agenda to undermine the country, carried out through religion. I tried to dispel their wrong thinking, but don’t think it was very effective. We could tell that our lives were moving into a more and more challenging situation, but our eyes were on God.
Picture: 47 year old Barbara at her father’s funeral
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