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Good Pasture from the Good Shepherd

 
“I will fear no evil for You are with me….” Psalm 23:4b
 
You, Lord God, are ever present, ever with us, your little lambs. If there is evil threatening, enemies approaching, you are there, watching, providing, protecting in whatever way you deem best.
 
Often we are living in limbo, uncertain of what is going to happen, in fear of possible danger or disappointment, and when the doors to the future open, we have no idea what is on the other side. But there is one thing we can be sure of: that you are there on the other side of that door, waiting to greet us with your planned path prepared.
 
As you announce in Jeremiah 29:11, “I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” In you we can rest.
 
“Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
 
The shepherd’s rod is a stout club to beat off attackers. Your rod is powerful, effective, more than sufficient to protect us from whatever Satan can bring against us–for you are invincible, undefeatable and all powerful. You have already won every battle at the cross.
 
And then there is your staff, the shepherd’s crook used to guide and correct your sheep as we stray. You are faithful to warn us when we wander willfully out of the way: you tap us on the shoulder, or you pull us back, or if necessary, give us a whack to get our attention. You guide us persistently, even when we insist on rebelling, trusting in ourselves rather than you.
 
You are absolutely faithful, fully wise and eternally good. Praise you that your pristine and positive character assures us of your perpetual protection and provision, all shown in the next phrase:
 
“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.”
 
As our good Shepherd, you bring us into positive places to graze. On the edges of the pasture may lurk wolves, bears, lions, or the great serpent, Satan. Their presence, however, does not need to disturb us, for you are our all-powerful protector. No one can skirt you, no one can thwart your plans or purposes. Therefore we can ignore the threats of the enemy and quietly, peacefully feed on what you have given, resting in your goodness, greatness and glory.
 
You are our good Shepherd, our great Guide, our Warrior King who has already defeated the enemy. As we remain in the shelter of your Word, your Way, your Wisdom, praising you in and for all, we are safe from true harm. You may lead us through many challenges, but in these you will protect and carry us through as we follow you. Help us, your little lambs, to do so today.
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Shepherds

It’s Sunday, time for another installment in my life’s story.

As Light Fellowship continued to develop, we gave more and more of the leadership over to the Turks. At one point we wanted them to select a leader and an assistant from among the five potential leaders. We called the leader a “shepherd” rather than pastor or elder, for these young men were not ready for such a weighty role, and this immediately became clear.

They were very reluctant to choose a shepherd from among themselves, and asked if we would continue our leadership while giving them more training.

My teammates and I agreed; they and the Turks then decided that I would be the “direct leader” for six weeks. In this way I could model for them how to lead the fellowship and how to navigate the difficulties that arose.

Even after the six weeks, they were unwilling to choose two leaders from among themselves, so we agreed to choose the leaders for them.

I was ready to pick Freedom, until one of my teammates pointed out to me that he was dating an unbeliever, thereby disqualifying himself biblically. I was so close to the situation that I hadn’t realized that I wasn’t being biblical in my choice. So we picked Robert as the shepherd and Carl as his assistant.

As time went on, there was attrition in our little group. As mentioned, we lost two to the Catholics and then Freedom married and went to Germany. Robert and Sam remained the stable ones, with Robert being chosen as the first official elder.

As this leadership developed, Barbara and I withdrew to give them room to operate without looking (over their shoulders) TO US for approval. Later we withdrew entirely from the fellowship when we went on furlough.

In the summer of 2005 while we were in the States, the pastor in my home church in Connecticut, challenged me to begin praying for revival, both for myself and for the church. I took up his challenge and added this to my prayer list.

The word “revival,” brings to mind exciting times of growth and expansion: changed lives, better relationships, spiritual passion, people coming to the Lord, church growth.

However, as I began to pray about revival and to look at instances in Scripture, it began to dawn on me that revival was more about the revelation of sin, repentance and making things right with God, with myself and with others. This was not an experience that was warm and fuzzy, exciting or pleasant. But it was good, powerful and transforming.

In Isaiah 6:1-8 is a description of a personal revival. All the elements are laid out for us to see: “In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying. And they were calling to one another:
‘Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty;
the whole earth is full of his glory.’ At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.”

Revival begins with a deeper revelation of God’s holiness. Seeing more of His purity, His greatness, His glory, His immensity brings a whole new shift in our perspective. We see this in Isaiah’s response, as he is brought to his knees:

“’Woe to me!’ I cried. ‘I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty.’”

Seeing more of God’s holiness results in becoming more aware of our own sinfulness. The light of His presence shines brightly to expose the darkness of sin in our old nature: in our thoughts, our motives, our actions.

This new clarity brings to the heart and mind not just a mild response: “Sure I’m a sinner,” but a deep realization of the horribleness of our rebellion against a holy God. We begin to grasp the terror of being a sinful person in the presence of the GOD Almighty who will judge our sin.

So revival also has to do with having God expose our sins in powerful, overwhelming ways to bring us down on our faces before Him. Such awareness of God’s holiness will “undo” us—tearing away the natural, faulty perception we have of ourselves and moving us further into the realm of spiritual Truth.

But this is not the end; there is one more step in the process of personal revival:
 “Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, ‘See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.’ ”

This third aspect of revival is the process of grasping on both a deeper and higher level how much we are forgiven. The exposure of how horrific our sin actually is, means we can more clearly see the greatness of God’s forgiveness.

Such full forgiveness flies in the face of all logic, all legal understanding, all human thought and emotion. God has every right to condemn us—we are his enemies because of our sin. Yet, He chooses to redeem and forgive us at great personal cost.

In a revival, the revelation of God’s holiness and our sinfulness enables us to grasp these great truths emotionally as well as intellectually. In the midst of this deeper understanding of how much we are loved and forgiven, we are “redone,” transformed to be a more useful instrument in God’s hand. We can see this in Isaiah’s response to God’s call.

“Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?’
And I said, ‘Here am I. Send me!’ ”

Revival brings a deeper surrender, a greater usefulness, an increased spiritual stamina. Isaiah’s revival helped him join God and move through a whole lifetime of great difficulties and trials.

I believe that this was just the beginning for him; I believe that Isaiah had an ongoing revival, starting with this initial encounter with God.

I also believe that God intends that for each of us, to have a life of ongoing revival as we cultivate our relationship with Him and nurture our first love for Jesus. And so it’s been in my life, an ongoing upward trajectory as God carries me onward in our relationship!

Picture of us in the bookstore where Light Fellowship met; it is from about the time of the above events.

 

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Psalm 23:4

Psalm 23:4 “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil;”
 
[At least one of the paths of righteousness you will lead me on, Lord, goes through this dark valley. It may be a time of dying to a desire, to my will, to a possession or it may be physical danger and sickness or death of a loved one or myself. Whatever it is, I do not need to fear that evil will triumph.
 
There may be loss and suffering, but in the end, evil will not win because Jesus is already the Victor and I belong to Him.
Think of Paul in his shipwreck described in Acts 27. In the midst of a great storm there were days and nights of uncertainty where Paul was cold, wet and hungry; and then the smashing of the ship into a sandbar and everyone having to swim to shore through crashing surf.
 
There was evil: the soldiers wanted to kill the prisoners, Paul included, so they couldn’t escape, but that was prevented. Then the viper bit Paul, but God protected him and no harm was done.
 
It was a dark valley, but in it, the witness of Paul shone brighter in his faith, in his declaration of God’s sovereignty, in his prediction (all possessions will be lost, all people will be saved), and in his being protected. Without that dark, the light would have not been seen so clearly.
 
As we take refuge in His love, power and truth, God does not always protect us from what will harm us physically, but from what would harm us spiritually. Then we can shine in the darkness of this world as a burning fire for those seeking Truth.
 
The valley of the shadow of death is not a threat but an opportunity to fulfill the purpose of our lives: honoring the One who walked this road before us and will walk with us through it again. So, let us look to Jesus, “who for the joy set before him endured the cross, despising the shame and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Heb. 12:2).
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Psalm 23:1-2

Psalm 23:1, 2 “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures.”
 
You, Lord Jesus, as my Shepherd, MAKE me to lie down in green pastures—you don’t ask what I think or want. You select the pasture I need now and keep me there as long as is necessary so I can grow and deepen, mature and develop to become more like Christ, a better instrument in your hand.
 
Joseph in the Old Testament didn’t particularly want to be a slave, or go to prison, but those were the green pastures you had for him. And there he learned to deny self, to live for you and to be a good administrator. This made him fit to save many others, including his family, the Egyptians, and the line of Jesus–so the Messiah could be born and eventually save us!
 
When finding ourselves in green pastures that aren’t pleasant (sickness, time in the hospital as I just had, loss, disappointment, heartache or failure, to name a few), we can follow this advice: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you KNOW that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:2-4).
 
In the hand of our Shepherd, difficulties are directive, problems are providential and heartaches can be healing if we cooperate with Him, continuing to lie down in the green pastures He selects.
 
A key aspect here is to embrace what He brings with thanksgiving rather than just suffering through with discontent and complaining. To embrace is to receive grace, to complain is to reject it: “God resists the proud [who reveal their pride by complaining] but gives grace to the humble [who accept with thanksgiving what He brings]” (James 4:6).
 
So, Lord, help us to trust you to know what for us is a green pasture and join you in what you are doing in and through it, in and through us.
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Partaking of the Divine Nature

I praise you, Lord Jesus, that as I awoke this morning, you were there–my God, my Shepherd, my elder Brother, my King. I praise you that this day I shall not lack anything I need, for you in your wisdom, your riches and your power have already provided all that is necessary and much more.
 
As it says in 2 Peter 1:3,4 “[Your] divine power HAS GIVEN us EVERYTHING we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of [you] who called us by [your] own glory and goodness.”
 
We just need to learn to take up your provision and use it—to get to know you more and more, to be filled with your Spirit, to put on the whole armor of God daily, to lift our souls to the Father and off-load our junk stress, to meditate on your Word and to flee temptation, taking refuge in you.
 
Because you have given us all we need for life and godliness, we don’t need to pray for patience, you have already given it to us! (There is nowhere in Scripture where we are told to pray for patience). We just have to pray, “Lord, I lay down my poor puny patience, and take up your great and glorious Patience, remembering that my times are in your hands, and you will move things along at the right pace as I trust in you.”
 
In addition, through your glory and goodness, Lord Jesus, you have “given us [your] very great and precious promises, so that through them [we] MAY PARTICIPATE IN THE DIVINE NATURE and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.”
 
Wow! We are able to participate in YOUR divine nature! What a gift, to be your children and to have the Holy Spirit indwell us, as He did David, Isaiah and Daniel. We are truly different from all other creatures and peoples because, as your born-again children, your divine nature dwells in us!
 
As John wrote in astonishment, “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” (1 John 3:1).
 
Help us, Lord Jesus, to live today in the reality of your personal indwelling and powerful provision. Help us to take up and use all that you have given us so we can live godly lives, bringing you honor, while shining your light and hope on all those around us, including my grand-kids in the picture below.
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Psalm 10:16-18

 
 
Psalm 10:16 “The LORD is King for ever and ever; the nations will perish from his land.”
 
[You, the Eternal One, set up and take down rulers and nations, you begin and end all, you will remove the wicked and restore the righteous. Of this we can be certain, because you, O God, are faithful and good forever.]
 
Psalm 10:17 “You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,”
 
[Praise be to you, the God who hears, who listens with complete understanding, who knows our hearts and answers with comfort in wisdom and power.]
 
Psalm 10:18 “defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more.”
 
[Praise you, Lord, that you defend, you provide, you protect and encourage. You will move us out from the oppression Satan wields through wicked men. Your love and care, your protection and deliverance will bring you glory and praise, honor and exaltation, for you are the King of Salvation!]
 
Help us to live today in the light of your goodness, trusting in the sure hope of your deliverance, whatever our situation might be, for you hear our cry, you will faithfully answer in the right way at the right time with the right deliverance, whether it be in this life or the next. Help us to trust you fully so that you may use us fully.
 
And my request today is that you would get my heart to work right so I can get out the hospital and back with my family! [Written way in the past, not a current event, and He did answer this prayer] Amen.
 
Picture: me in my hospital gown with my IV buddy.
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Perfect Protection

“I will say of the LORD, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’ Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence.”
Psalm 91:2,3

Such deliverance I experienced when arrested for my faith, being threatened with death by the police, but God intervened, as in the picture below and by His grace, here I am today.

Praise be to you for your great promises, Lord Jesus, such as the one above in Psalm 91. These promises are fastened at one end to your plans laid out before the foundation of the earth, then stretched over time as a canopy of protection, and fastened at the other end in the conclusion of history–when all evil and sin will be swept away and confined to Hell and the lake of fire.
 
Your faithfulness is our shield and rampart, throwing back the attacks of the enemy. We live every day under your powerful, pure and persistent protection. And you give us a part in this, equipping us with the ever-present and portable protection of the spiritual armor (Ephesians 6:10-18).
 
I praise you especially for the shield of faith, which we can choose at any time to raise with praise to quench all the fiery arrows of lies and accusations the enemy shoots at us.
 
At the same time, we live with the ever-present possibility of “escaping” to our own devices, wandering off into the fields of self and sin, exposing ourselves to the sinister attacks of Satan.
 
You have certainly given us great freedom of choice: great power to dwell in your shelter, or not. And in giving us this choice-potential, you have exposed yourself to grief and pain as we often choose to disobey, to not forgive, to not get up the shield of faith. Thank you for your willingness to continue to suffer sadness as you seek to conform us to Christ.
 
Praise you for your persistence in moving us towards maturity, bringing diverse difficulties our way so that we can practice procuring your grace, persisting in prayer, performing in wisdom, playing our part with joy–and thereby be protected from the “snares of the fowler.”
 
Yours is such love, such kindness, such empowering, such willingness to suffer for the good of your children! There is no other like you! You are the Lord my God, you are the Creator and Savior, King and Shield, Protector and Redeemer, to you be glory and honor and praise forever.
 
Prayer: “I bow before you, my King, and give myself to you anew with all my heart, mind, soul and strength. May I honor you today in all I say and do. Lead me in what is righteous, good, lovely and graceful. Amen.”
Picture from Bible Museum in Dallas Texas
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Psalm 10:12-15

Psalm 10:12 “Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God. Do not forget the helpless.”
 
[The psalmist has ended his complaint and now turns to you, Jehovah God, the only true help, who will move to intervene. Perhaps you have not acted earlier because no one prayed for your help, even though you prompted them to do so. But now the writer prays and you will answer.]
 
Psalm 10:13 “Why does the wicked man revile God? Why does he say to himself, ‘He won’t call me to account’”?
 
[the answer: he is blind, caught in the net of delusion the enemy has set for him; he fell into this trap because he rejected the light, the truth that God offered him. He has, like Esau, valued power, position and prosperity above what is of eternal value.]
 
Psalm 10:14 “But you, O God, do see trouble and grief; you consider it to take it in hand. The victim commits himself to you; you are the helper of the fatherless.”
 
[We can commit our feeble, helpless and vulnerable lives to you, O Lord, for you are our defender, our shield, our high tower, our salvation. You are the One who sees the fatherless, the widow, the helpless ones and will act on their behalf.]
 
Psalm 10:15 “Break the arm of the wicked and evil man; call him to account for his wickedness that would not be found out.”
 
[You, O Holy God, do see all, you will act and judge evil, at the right time. Praise you for your great and powerful working! Help us to wait for your perfect timing.
 
As it says in Psalm 37:7-9, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret–it leads only to evil. For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.”
 
Help us to be still before you, Lord, to reject our anger, wrath and fretting, to rest in you, knowing that you will deal with evil. Help us to obey you in what we know to be right so we can be a reflection of your light–like the double sun in this picture–shining grace and truth on all those around us.]
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Post Op

After my open heart surgery, I woke up in the recovery room. My mouth was painfully dry, and there was a big tube in it. When the orderly noticed that I was awake, he came over and removed the tube, which evidently went right down into my windpipe, forcing oxygen into my lungs.
 
When they had cut through my sternum and then pulled my rib cage open to access my heart for surgery, I was unable to breathe on my own, so a machine had taken over. Now with my sternum wired back together, I was able to breath again without assistance.
 
The orderly lifted me up a bit and said, “Cough!” I tried to but a searing pain shot through my chest.
 
“I need some water!” I said. He brought me a little cup which I drank very slowly, then another one, after which the orderly left the room. Suddenly I realized I was going to throw up all over my incision!
 
I looked to the side of the bed where there was a large trash can; there I saw what looked like an empty plastic ice cream container. I could just reach it, and got it up to my mouth in time for all the water I’d drunk to come back out!
That was just like the Lord to have that container right there so I wouldn’t throw up all over my new stitches! Another gracious God sighting.
 
The care in the hospital was excellent and after three days they sent me home. I assumed that among the medicines I was given to take home, they had included a painkiller. But I was wrong. My pain grew worse and worse and finally, Barbara called the surgeon.
“Oh, you’d like some painkiller?” She asked, “Well, just go down to the pharmacy and get some of this…”
 
That little conversation brought out two other things I like about the medical process in Turkey. You can just call up and talk directly with your doctor and you can buy whatever medicine they tell you to from the pharmacy without any prescription! Barbara went out and got me the pain medicine.
 
I had to sleep in the living room on the foldout couch because our bed was too low for me to get up from easily. With my chest still healing, I couldn’t raise myself to a normal sitting position, so Josh tied a rope around the arm of the couch by my feet; holding this rope in my hands, I could pull myself up without help. it was effective but a little strange looking; one of my friends chuckled as he asked if I were trying to use my couch as a horse wagon.
 
One night I was awakened by the couch shaking from side to side. It was actually my chest pain caused by this motion that woke me up. I was disoriented and looked around to see who was shaking me, but quickly realized that it was a mild earthquake. We have them from time to time in Ankara. After it subsided I was able to sleep again.
 
A few days later I was again jarred out of sleep, this time by my heart beating rapidly and erratically. I turned on the light and looked at my watch; it was 11 pm. And it was nine days after my open-heart surgery. I took some medicine to try to stop the pounding, but it had no effect.
 
I prayed for the Lord to do something, but my heart just kept thrashing around in my chest. The Lord gave me the determination to get myself to the hospital, so about 1:30 am I got up and went to the bedroom to tell Barbara that I was going. She helped me to get dressed, called a taxi and with her help I made my way up the two flights of stairs to street level.
 
Although it was only the end of October, we were surprised to find it snowing heavily. Barbara went out to the road to see if the taxi was coming. I took a few steps towards the road and suddenly inexplicably found myself sitting in several inches of wet snow. I’d blacked out and sat down without realizing it!
 
I praised God that I hadn’t fallen forward or to the side where I would have hit my head on railings or the wall. I was able to pull myself up by holding onto the “burglar bars” of the window next to the walkway, and staggered out to the road just as the taxi arrived.
 
This snowstorm was so early and unexpected that the taxis did not yet have snow tires on, so it was a slippery ride down the hill. To get to the hospital faster, I had the driver turn down a one way street the wrong way as a shortcut. We met a police car coming from the other direction, but since it was now 2 am, they didn’t bother to stop us.
 
Barbara called Josh, who lived near the hospital, and he met me there. The doctor on duty immediately got me into a bed and began administering medication to slow down and stabilize my heartbeat. As it began to take effect, I began to sob.
 
“I don’t know why I’m crying,” I gasped to the doctor, “Everything is going fine!”
 
“Don’t worry, your emotional state is just a side effect of your heart racing!” he assured me.
 
It took several hours to get my heart stabilized before they transferred me to a room in the post-op recovery area. When I woke up later I wondered why my bed was so damp, and then realized I was still wearing the clothes that were wet from my falling in the snow!
 
The doctors kept me in the hospital for three days to make sure my heart was fully stabilized. During this time I was able to talk and pray with a number of other patients, some of whom were about to have open-heart surgery; others were having complications in their recovery. The Lord often has multiple reasons for allowing unexpected things to happen in our lives, placing us into situations to serve Him.
 
The rest of my recovery went well and within a few weeks I was able to take an active role again in church planting and team leadership.
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Shelter in a World of Worries

 
“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
Psalm 91:1
 
Praise be to you, O Lord, for your wonderful faithfulness—you never leave your children: you always protect, always guide and always encourage. I praise you that you have given your children a shelter that is both your Word and yourself—you who are the Most High, the Final Authority, the Almighty, the All Wise, All Knowing, All Loving God.
 
You, in your grace, wisdom and care, have provided us with this needed shelter in a twisted, dangerous and sin-filled world. Your commands, principles and examples show us how to live within your protection from sin, self and Satan. And you yourself spread your wings over us to keep us safe; under your feathers of grace we find protection.
 
Praise you for your invitation for us to come to your shelter and remain in your refuge. As we obey your Word, think Truth, listen to the Spirit and make prayer the foundation of all we do, we remain in your fortress. There we are protected from unnecessary mistakes and unneeded difficulties. We are spared the troubles of those who reject your shelter: the confusion of the wicked, the fall of the proud, the anguish of the stubborn, the foolishness of the rebels, the stumbling of the self-confident.
 
As your Word says, “The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining ever more brightly till the full light of day. But the path of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble” (Pro. 4:18,19).
 
You are our Refuge, calling us to your arms, to your lap, to your embrace. You are our Fortress, calling us to safety behind your walls of truth and power. You are our Deliverer, calling us to worship and obedience as our God, our final authority. You are the Righteous One who has the right to rule calling us to rich submission.
 
And you are the One who imputes your righteousness to us, protecting us from the wrath to come, sheltering us from the evil around us and in us.
 
You are thorough, you are wise, you are persistent: protecting us and providing for us even when we protest against your profound and perfect Word. You keep on working, bringing us to repentance, bringing us to your refuge, bringing us to transformation.
 
From within your protection, we will see the downfall of those who refuse your invitation, who decline to obey you. As we stay in your shelter, true harm, true evil (that which will damage us spiritually) will not come to us, for you, Lord God, will work out all that is needed for our safety: “If you say, ‘The LORD is my refuge,’ and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you…” (Ps. 91:9,10).
 
I exalt you today, O Eternal Lord of creation and God of graciousness, who rules forever in complete goodness, out of unending love and with deep wisdom. You are worthy of worship, praise, honor and obedience, Glory be to you!
 
Prayer: “Lord, help me to dwell in your shelter today, thinking truth, obeying what I know to be true, praising you in and for all. Amen.”
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